Embracing Destiny Read online

  “I am the only one who can be hurt by their words if I decide they are valid, which I don’t. I am not normal, and I am perfectly okay with it. I love you all, but keep in mind that they look to us to lead them. You must be kind and decide what you allow to bother you. Words cannot hurt us unless we let them. Now, go eat and make friends.” I ruffled his hair and then kissed Kahleena on the cheek. “One day, you will lead, and you will need to do so while being able to see the world through the eyes of others. Hearing their comments and opinions and not being offended is very important. Kindness is a better quality in a leader than anger; that’s important to remember.”

  I stood up, taking in Icelyn’s posture as she winced, running her hand over her belly while Lilith stood beside her, rocking an infant in her arms. They remained at a distance from the other women, indicating as newly joined members of the horde, they still felt like outsiders. As I moved toward them, Icelyn cried out and bent at the waist, her hand gripping the small of her back. I gazed at the floor, watching the fluid that rushed down the inside of her legs.

  “I think I wet myself,” she admitted as pink colored her cheeks.

  “Darynda,” I murmured, knowing my trusted handmaiden would be close by, waiting for me to direct her. “I need my bedroom emptied of people, and towels and clean water brought in immediately.” Her eyes followed mine before growing round and wide as they settled on Icelyn. I produced a towel, lowering it to the floor, silently cleaning the fluid that continued to trickle down Icelyn’s legs.

  “Oh, don’t do that. You’re the queen,” Icelyn muttered with tears filling her icy-blue eyes. “I think I wet myself, but the babes keep shifting, and my body isn’t my own anymore,” her tone was filled with embarrassment and horror. “I can do that.” Icelyn bent toward the towel, but the pain stopped her. “Something isn’t right.”

  “You’re in labor,” I announced, standing as the cloth vanished. “I may be queen, but I am never above helping my family, no matter what title I hold.”

  “No, I can’t be in labor. I’m not due for two more months.” Icelyn’s face suddenly turned ashen, and her body began to tremble.

  “Your water just broke, which means the babes are coming whether we are ready for them or not. Come with me, so we don’t worry the other children as we bring yours into the world.” I extended my hand to her while Lilith gave the infant she’d been fawning over to Keely. “I had my chamber prepared for you.”

  “But I will soil your bed,” she complained.

  “It’s just a bed, and it’s the only room where you can have privacy. It’s also soundproofed, so your screams will not upset the little ones. I am queen, remember? You have to do as I say.” I smiled tightly like an idiot as she laughed, but it was empty from the pain she was enduring. “You will come to my bedroom, where we will assist you through the beginning of your labor. I am sure the men will return shortly, then the wards on the tower will cease, and Eliran will be able to come up from the infirmary to deliver your children. Until that happens, we need to get you laid down and comfortable.”

  “I’m not ready, though, Sinjinn isn’t here.” Icelyn’s eyes widened in horror as the reality of the situation hit her.

  “He will be here before your babes arrive. You can’t worry about what is happening outside the doors, Icelyn. Your children are coming, and what is happening right now is all that matters. Ciara, assist me,” I whispered, watching as Ciara handed Fury to Meera, the newest handmaiden.

  Worried violet eyes held mine as we helped Icelyn into the room and disrobed her before settling her onto the bed. Blood coated her thighs along with mucus from the membranes of her cervix. We were both thinking the same thing: Icelyn’s children were coming too early, and complications of an early birth could be bad, very bad. Once she was stripped naked, I removed the blankets from the bed, laying her down and pulling the sheet up to cover her the moment she was in a prone position.

  Standing back, I nodded to her, terrified that we were locked inside the tower, and no one could reach us until the men finished handling whatever was occurring outside the fortress. I withdrew the phone from my pocket, dialing Eliran as I stepped outside the bedroom door and stood in the narrow hallway. I silently prayed the reception would work well enough to reach him in the infirmary.

  “Syn? Everything okay?” his deep, soothing voice came through the receiver.

  “Icelyn is in labor,” I answered, somehow keeping the fear from my tone.

  “She isn’t due for two more months.”

  “I’m very aware of that, but her water broke, and we’re locked in the tower. I don’t know how long it will be before Ryder opens the door, and from the way she is wincing, her contractions aren’t that far apart. What do we do?”

  “This isn’t good,” he muttered worriedly. I could hear him moving around in his medical ward through the phone. “Is there a lot of blood?”

  “Just a little, but it looks thin. There’s no gushing or anything like that.”

  “That’s good,” Eliran sighed in relief. “It’s Icelyn’s first pregnancy, so it won’t be a quick labor. The fact that she is having twins is going to complicate the situation, which isn’t good news. I’ll get the staff ready to meet me outside the tower door, so we can get to her as soon as it opens. I’ll get a message to Ryder stating we have a precarious medical condition in the tower. Keep her rested and be sure she drinks enough fluids. I need to prepare the incubator since the babes are premature; they will need help. If I’m not there when they come, you need to be ready to deliver them.”

  “Let’s just plan on you doing that part.” I expelled a breath, listening to the women, who were keeping the conversation lighthearted in the room behind me.

  “Was the fluid clear?” he asked gently.

  “Yeah, it looked like water on the floor, but there were some traces of blood. I have Icelyn resting on my bed, but she’s not happy about her children being born early.”

  “That’s good; that’s really good. Just keep her calm and rested. If it comes down to it, and she feels as if she needs to push, don’t stop her. Trying to stop her labor would do more harm than good at this point. Thousands of babes are born every day. It’s natural, and her body will do what it’s supposed to do. Just be there to clean out the babies’ mouths and find something to clamp the cords if they do come quickly. I’m here, too; if anything changes, call me and I’ll walk you through it.”

  “If the babes are born this early, do you think they’ll survive?” I asked, hating to pose the question that no one else would.

  “No. The odds are against them,” he stated honestly. “If the twins are born this early, they may be stillborn. I need not point out the other complications of having children in this world since you know it better than most.”

  “Thanks for being honest,” I snapped.

  “I can’t lie; besides that, you need to prepare for the reality of what is happening. Keep her hopeful because if she gives up, we may lose her too.”

  “Eliran, I can’t do this. What if I mess it up, and they suffer because of it, or something worse happens?” I whispered, voice trembling as a tear rolled down my cheek.

  “You can because you must. You are one of the fiercest women I have ever had the pleasure of meeting, Synthia. If anyone can do this, it is you.”

  I hung up the call, entering the bedroom with a smile in place, wincing as Icelyn released a pain-filled shriek. Darynda lifted the thin sheet, peering between Icelyn’s legs, and frowned, shaking her head. Righting the material back over Icelyn for modesty’s sake, she walked to me, urgency filling her stride.

  “Something is wrong. The babies are coming faster than they should be.”

  “They’re tiny and very early,” I admitted. “Get water for her to drink, please. Check on my babes. Make sure Olivia and Alannah are keeping them occupied an
d not killing each other in the process. Let Olivia know that if she feels the need, she is welcome to help us here. I know she is closer to Icelyn than we are.”

  Babes, my children were far from babies, and yet it was hard to admit that only a few weeks ago, they’d been crawling. My attention moved back to Icelyn, and I positioned myself next to the bed, studying the strain on her face as I took her hand in mine.

  “You said hours, but I don’t think we have hours.” She swallowed a cry, raising an icy-blue stare to lock with mine. “It’s too early for them to survive.”

  “It is early, but sometimes babes are born before their time, especially when they are twins,” I replied lamely, smiling even though it probably made me look clinically insane. “We got this.” I patted her hand, hoping to reassure her as my stomach flipped with the lie. The reality of what was coming hit me. “If you feel the need to push, we need to know. Eliran said it might take a few hours, but if you feel the need to push, you push.” She nodded while the others sat around, offering helpful advice when needed. Before an hour had passed, they had Icelyn laughing and telling lame jokes to fill the silence of the room.

  An hour later, the contractions were closer, and Icelyn cried as pain racked her delicate frame. Olivia held one hand while Ciara held the other. The sheet had been removed, and the first babe’s head was trying to push free from his mother’s body.

  Over an hour of labor occurred, and Icelyn weakened more and more with each contraction. Tears slipped down her cheeks, forming drops of ice that fell to the bed.

  The room was freezing, so Darynda brought baby Fury in and handed him to Keely. His presence brought the temperature up to where we could withstand the chilling cold Icelyn’s pain was sending through the room. Every contraction she had lowered the temperature. Then, Fury would giggle, and it would rise again. Thank the goddess for the little dragon babe, because everyone was already covered in blankets to bear the cold.

  I paced aimlessly, fighting against the rising panic that held the room in its clutches. I cursed the men for being slow against the monsters that had set off the alarms and then cursed myself for doing so.

  Icelyn screamed again, and Darynda looked over her shoulder to where I paced, shaking her head in worry. I could sense the men fighting, knew they were doing everything they could to get back to us, and yet I knew they wouldn’t make it in time.

  I moved closer, peering down between Icelyn’s legs at the dark hair that finally crowned, but refused to come out any further. I worried my lip with my teeth, noting the others who looked at me with anxiety while Icelyn sobbed in pain. Every moment the babe remained stuck in the birthing canal, the chances of survival decreased.

  Icelyn bore down, her body covered in sweat from the effort to bring her babe into the world. Exhaustion marred her face, and her scream filled the room as she continued to push while blood covered the mattress beneath her bottom.

  I ground my teeth together in frustration, redialing Eliran, the call going straight to voicemail. Tossing the phone aside, I crawled onto the bed, straddling my legs beside Icelyn’s frame as I sat behind her. The women moved into place, switching from chairs to the bed.

  My skin touched hers, and I tried to take away her pain. Thankfully, I’d learned that was part of my gift, and the skill had come in handy a lot lately. It did little, though, to help the woman sobbing while her body contorted. Something was wrong, and no one knew what to do. I didn’t know how to save her or the babies.

  “Icelyn, you need to listen to me. The baby is not coming fast enough.” I wrapped my arms around her. “We’re here to help you and your babies, do you understand?” She nodded, and I continued speaking low and clearly. “When you feel the urge to push, push, and we will do our part. On the next contraction, give it everything you have.”

  Olivia grabbed one leg, and Ciara grabbed the other while I held Icelyn’s belly. I sent a silent prayer to the gods. Not that those fuckers cared, but we needed any help we could get. Icelyn shook her head, begging us to get help for the babe. The problem was, no one was coming to help us. We were alone.

  The moment we felt the contraction, we all helped Icelyn. She screamed while we helped push her knees against her chest. My hand pushed down gently on her swollen belly while Darynda watched the babe trying to be born. Her gaze lifted to mine in apprehension while the contraction abated. I exhaled slowly, uncertain what else we could try.

  Another contraction occurred, and still, no babe. I closed my emotions down to prepare for the worst to happen, praying we wouldn’t lose this child before it even had a chance to fight. Icelyn screamed when the next contraction hit harder than the last, and I massaged her stomach while she cursed the fates that were punishing her. Water exploded from her body as the first babe finally pushed through.

  “Oh no,” Darynda muttered, holding up the lifeless, blue body. Silence filled the room with her words, and my heart stopped beating.

  Icelyn wailed while Olivia and Ciara both held her, pushing her face into their chest while I stared at the lifeless form we’d just fought to bring into this world. I slipped from behind Icelyn, rushing to the babe.

  “No, no, no. Don’t do this to us,” I cried, rubbing my hand over the child’s chest before I took him from Darynda. My mouth touched his, feeling for breath before I blew over his mouth and nose, and checked it for anything blocking his airway.

  “My baby,” Icelyn sobbed, the anguish in it hitting me hard as tears burned my eyes.

  “I forbid you from dying,” I snapped. “Do you hear me? I forbid it!” My hands glowed amber as silence filled the room. The glow spread throughout my body, and my skin looked as if someone had sprinkled glitter all over me.

  The door burst open, and men flooded through the doorway, yet I didn’t stop. My hair floated around me as my hands held on to the tiny being, refusing to allow him to leave his parents. “You will not die, do you hear me? I said I forbid it! You are loved, and you are our family. Stay,” I pleaded with tears running down my face.

  “Holy Goddess,” Icelyn whispered as a tiny scream filled the room. Relief washed through me violently as small ice-blue eyes opened and held mine, little lips parted, and the baby wailed his displeasure. “You blessed him, Synthia.”

  My eyes slid from the child to his mother and back. My hands trembled with emotion as I moved, handing Icelyn the wailing babe. I stepped back, taking in the worried gazes watching me and my every move as I glowed like Danu had often done. I spun around, rushing from the room and the anxious glances, not bothering to stop until I was in the hallway.

  “Destiny!” I shouted, hugging my stomach.

  “Synthia?” Ryder demanded, Zahruk and Ristan beside him.

  Ryder’s armor was covered in blood, proof of why they’d been delayed. Eliran rushed past us, not stopping to see what had transpired as he made his way to the room with the incubator. Power erupted around us, and I turned, staring at Destiny.

  “Tell me I didn’t intervene. Tell me my children will not pay for what I just did!” I demanded.

  Her eyes bulged and moved to Ryder and then back to my glowing body. “What happened?”

  “I forbid a babe from dying. He wasn’t breathing, and I forbid it from happening, and then I began to glow with power. Tell me my children are safe. I didn’t mean to use my powers.”

  “Oh, Synthia. You did what you’re meant to do. You saved a child of Faery. No one can intervene with whom you save when being born. Your children will not pay for you forbidding a life from ending before it has even begun. You are Goddess of the Fae, and therefore the only one who can forbid death from occurring in the first stages of life. You saved a babe. It’s part of the job you perform for your people. The only thing you cannot do is bring life back from death. Although he never breathed, he wasn’t dead. He just needed your help to take his first breath.”

 
Relief slammed into me, and I sagged. Wiping away the tears of fear, I doubled over, placing my hands on my knees, exhaling a ragged breath. I nodded to Destiny, knowing she needed to be elsewhere. “Thank you.”

  “Don’t thank me. Your mother knew this world needed you. I voted to end your life,” she said with a shrug. “Now, go enjoy the happiness of his birth. You’ve earned it.”

  Inside the room, Eliran was checking the babe’s stats. He lifted his gaze and nodded to me. “It’s a boy,” he announced.

  “I’m very aware. He peed on me.”

  Arms wrapped around me while the room became chaotic. “You saved my nephew, Pet.”

  “No, I just wouldn’t allow him to go before his parents knew him. It terrified me to lose the baby before Icelyn and Sinjinn had gotten a chance to love him, or even hold him.”

  “I know, I felt it,” Ryder growled at my ear. “We all did. I knew you could do this. You’re the bravest woman I know.”

  “I have a son.” Sinjinn smiled proudly through tears swimming in his vision as Sevrin peered down at the tiny red infant. “I have a son blessed by the Goddess of the Fae.”

  “You have a beautiful son, but he had a tough birth. Icelyn did amazing, but everyone needs to give Eliran room to deliver the other babe. Anyone who doesn’t need to be here should leave,” I ordered, expelling a shaky breath. “He is perfect, Sinjinn.”

  “Thank you. Thank you for saving my son.”

  “He’s family. We don’t give up on family around here,” I uttered thickly, leaving the bedroom to check on my children. At the door, Sinjinn called out to me.