Embracing Destiny Read online

  Ryder’s stare held mine as heat smoldered within the inky depths.

  “We’ve brought men who hated the horde into our family, and guild librarians that never imagined having enough pictures to fill their frames. Your sister married a dragon. The lesser courts are now working with us because you offered marriages to their daughters, who became queens. You did this, Ryder. You’ve done so much good in what little time you’ve been King of the Horde. Imagine what we can do with a lifetime of ruling?” I smiled, leaning over to kiss him. “You’re a good king, an amazing husband, and the best father I could have ever envisioned for my children.”

  “Don’t let our enemies hear you,” he chuckled, kissing me back.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Fires burned across the courtyard, stretching as far as the eye could see, but not from the camps. Torch fires were being used to ward off the morning fog as the horde mounted warhorses, preparing to ride into the valley for battle. The warriors showed no fear nor worried about facing off against the coldhearted prick trying to destroy us in his grief over losing my mother.

  The war drums beat endlessly, signaling to the settlements around the stronghold that the invincible creatures of the horde were preparing to ride out to battle against our enemies. Steel clanged against metal as they fit horses with armor before the riders took their seats on the mounts. Ryder had instructed me to remain on the battlements, viewing the progress as they prepared to go off into the unknown.

  Ryder and I said our goodbyes early this morning before he’d gone outside to help the men. My heart clenched in my throat while I studied his unbending spine and prowess while teaching the simple folk how to wield their weapons.

  I’d married a man who had been born to lead, to teach those who were willing to adapt and learn his expertise, and I couldn’t have loved him more if I’d tried. He was everything I needed and all that was good in the world. The idea of him marching off to battle without me left me numb and terrified, even though I knew he was strong enough to do this on his own.

  “This is utter shit,” Ciara snapped in frustration as she stared at Remy and Blane among the horde’s elite troops stationed around Ryder’s position.

  “Amen to that.” I peered down the line of women and warriors who stood with me on the battlement, each wishing we could follow our family into battle. “They’ll return to us, all of them.”

  Lena scrutinized Lucian. Her gaze narrowed on his form as if she wasn’t sure she wanted him to come back. I cleared my throat to gain her attention. Her blue gaze turned toward me, studying me as a frown tugged at her lips.

  “Are you good?” I asked softly, hoping not to be overheard.

  “I’m great,” she replied softly, and yet her tone wasn’t convincing. “Ever learn something so horrible and so wrong that you aren’t sure if it is truth or another lie?”

  “Yes,” I laughed soundlessly. I felt Lena’s unease as surely as my own. The hair on my nape stood up, and power slithered through the horde as more men mounted horses. “You and Lucian are good, though, right?”

  “No, but we have a very strict no-speak policy about it right now, actually. We’re in somewhat of a truce while you need us. Afterward, well, I’m uncertain where we stand anymore. I know that I crave Lucian, and I know I love him.”

  “So, you’re not planning his death while he’s here?” I smirked, my nose scrunching up as she shrugged her shoulders. I turned my gaze to search the sea of troops for Lucian, finding him studying Lena with a pensive look of longing. His dark brows rose as if he could hear us whispering about him over the sound of the war drums.

  “I don’t think anything can kill Lucian, but I sure as fuck wouldn’t mind if they knocked some of the cocky-dick out of the prick.” Lena shrugged again, and I took in the way Lucian’s mouth twisted up into a sardonic smile.

  “Okay then,” I frowned.

  Ciara studied Blane’s posture as the dragons spread out away from Ryder, taking their position on the outside of the front formation of warriors. Others, like Remy, were already in dragon form.

  Our gazes lifted, finding them flying high above the horde as the last of the men mounted their warhorses. All around us, the mountains moved with troops, forty thousand strong and counting as each caste sent their strongest fighters to the frontline.

  The flags rose, signaling the king was out of the stronghold. I exhaled slowly as Fyra, in her dragon form, landed on the newly added perches that stuck out over the courtyard. They were long and sturdy enough for the dragons to land on without fear of falling. Another female dragon landed on our other side, turning her scale-covered head to release a bloodcurdling screech that echoed through the mountains. The men below peered up and studied the mythical beasts that, only a few months ago, we’d thought to have been extinct.

  Ryder’s dark head lifted, and he held my gaze, regarding me remorsefully as if, right now, he was regretting his choice in telling me to remain on the battlements. He was unable to show any affection in front of the horde that flanked him in every direction.

  The Elite Guards were the last men to mount their horses. They were decked out in black cloaks and heavy armor that could blend into the terrain should the need arise. Ryder wore the same obsidian armor he’d worn while chasing me during the Wild Hunt celebration. He pretended to be the dark prince when, in fact, he was the very king the hunt was honoring. Thick leather straps studded with onyx jewels set in dulled silver crisscrossed his chest. They held a variety of wicked-looking blades that I’d witnessed him using a few times before as he had effortlessly taken down his prey.

  Ryder’s warhorse turned its head, eyeing me with blood-red eyes. I smiled, nodding to the wild horse before looking back at his rider. Hounds and men surrounded the warhorse, protecting the king even though he wore the protective armor as well.

  Ryder shouted above the noise of his army, telling them they would soon begin their trek to the valley. I sifted without thought, standing in front of his warhorse, lifting my hands to pet the silky mane along his neck. Stalling their forward march, I peered up into golden eyes that studied me as the men moved the protective barrier around me too.

  I opened my mouth to speak, needing to tell him how much I loved him, but I couldn’t. My gaze moved to the red cloaks of the dragon riders, to the iridescent cloaks of the light fae, sent to us by Abiageal, the holder of the Light Kingdom.

  My head lifted slowly, and my eyes locked with Ryder’s stare, displaying everything I wanted to say that simple words couldn’t convey. He studied me carefully while remaining silent atop the huge battle-ready warhorse that stomped the ground and snorted as he spoke inside my head.

  “You were supposed to stay put, woman. We don’t say goodbyes, remember?”

  “I love you; I love you so much, Ryder,” I repeated it, closing my eyes before I spoke loudly. “Kill every last one of those motherfucking mages, My King. Bring me their skulls so we can drink our wine from them while toasting your victory. I need new drinking horns, and they’d be welcomed here to remind our enemies how the horde responds to threats.” I swallowed, noting how his lips curved into a wicked smile that left me boneless.

  “Do you hear your bloodthirsty queen, horde? She wants the skulls of our enemies so we may toast to our victory from them!” Ryder shouted, and the horde erupted in cheers around us.

  He reached down, pulling me up onto the horse before his lips brushed against mine. It was the first and only show of affection he’d ever allowed the horde to witness, other than the day we’d been wed, surrounded by them in the meadows.

  Ryder’s hand captured my hair, twisting my head so he could claim my mouth in a hungry kiss. My power rushed through him and then shot out, seeking the surrounding men who scrutinized us until shouts of wonder and pride echoed at their king’s choice of mate. He didn’t stop kissing me until I was panting against hi
s lips, lust rushing through us both, and the need to seek the privacy of our room intensified.

  “You’re my fucking unicorn, woman. My bloodthirsty queen, you own my heart. Do you understand me?” Ryder’s hand cradled my cheek, his forehead resting against mine before he pulled away, and the horde continued to cheer for him.

  “I do,” I admitted, sifting back to the battlement. His head turned, and his eyes took me in, burning with pride. I held my hand up, signaling for the braziers to be lit, signifying that the queen and king were no longer within the castle, but an heir had remained. This was an important maneuver in keeping up the pretense that I had left the stronghold with Ryder.

  I smiled, thinking back on the words he had said in front of the horde. I understood their meaning. Ryder had just told me he loved me the only way he could with the horde standing around us. He’d admitted to his feelings long ago, but this time, it meant more. Ryder had just shown his army that he loved their queen, and that was a huge step for us. My heart clenched, tightening with the love he filled me with.

  Ryder was going off to war against our enemies, and he’d kissed me, something the horde would have generally seen as a weakness, yet they’d cheered him on. Whether it was because I wasn’t just their queen, but also the Goddess of the Fae, I didn’t care. I’d fed them all strength to fight this war, and I hadn’t held back how I felt for their king.

  We remained on the battlements long into the night. I struggled with the immense pain from the loss of more fae, but I refused to leave until the army reached the mountain passes and was out of sight. Even when we could no longer make out their forms, we still didn’t move from our position. It wasn’t until I leaned against the wall for support, and Darynda touched my shoulder, pushing a cloth into my hand, that I realized something was wrong.

  “Oh, my gods, what the hell? You’re bleeding, Synthia?” Ciara demanded, moving to help me as others followed her lead.

  “It’s not me,” I muttered, hissing in pain as I lost my footing. I slowly slid to the stone flooring of the battlement, bending over as a scream ripped from my lungs, filling the night air.

  “Help me get her inside,” Ciara ordered.

  “No. Something isn’t right,” I whispered as my hands wrapped around my stomach against the clenching pain.

  “People are sifting into the courtyard,” Lena said in confusion. “Should we handle them before they become a problem?”

  “Help me up!” I growled, sensing something was horribly wrong. I allowed both Darynda and Ciara to each grab an elbow, helping me back to my feet. I stared down at the bloodied people, and my stomach dropped to the ground where I’d just been sitting. I sifted, unsteady on my feet as I moved toward Adam, who turned toward me, covered in blood. “Adam?”

  Adam lifted his head slowly, leveling forest-green eyes on me that swam with unshed tears. “The Dark Kingdom has fallen.” He fell to his knees, placing his hands over his face before resting his forehead against the ground. “Keir fell, as did my mother and my brothers. The entire kingdom fell to our enemies.”

  “How?” I knelt beside him, rubbing my hand along his back, taking in the blood and cuts that covered his body. “How could they fall, Adam?”

  Sitting up, Adam wiped tears from his eyes, anguish and anger playing across his features. “From within, because someone let them in to murder us as we feasted in celebration. We were to march here at first light, but the mage army got to us before the sun rose. This is what I saved, and what is left of the Shadow Warriors.” Spreading his arms wide, he indicated the other people that had sifted with him into the courtyard.

  I turned, noting the air was displaced, and Liam appeared, falling to his knees on the ground, dripping blood from multiple wounds. Pain ripped through me as I saw him lift his head to utter the words I feared.

  “No!” The denial slid over my tongue, and I rushed to Liam, tears pricking my eyes as a vise clamped around my heart. It thundered in my ears, deafening me as I fought to control the heaviness of loss that tried to bring me to my knees.

  “The Blood Kingdom is gone, Synthia. The queen and king, everyone, they’re just gone. I found Arryn wounded, but everyone else was dead when I returned. I told the Blood Warriors to gather here, but I don’t know how many got out.” Liam looked around the courtyard, noticing all the injured people and making their way into the castle. Shaking his head, he scrubbed his hand over his face before looking at me. “It was a bloodbath. Severed and lifeless bodies were scattered on every level, on every floor of the palace. Someone inside the castle let our enemies in to murder us. When night fell, and the dinner meal was served, the mage army attacked our family as they sat down to feast in celebration of coming here to join the war.”

  I dropped to my knees beside Liam as grief shot through me. My arms wrapped around my middle as giant sobs rocked through me. Lasair was my father, his blood ran through my veins, and we’d failed them. My sisters and brothers and their army of children had been slaughtered while I’d watched my husband march off to war. I’d ignored the immense pain that had bludgeoned through me for hours. I’d assumed it was nameless fae when in reality, he’d hit us where we would feel it the hardest.

  They’d taken out the high fae, leaving their mark, just as we’d planned to do the exact same thing to them. We’d assumed the mages wouldn’t target the higher castes until they’d battled with the lesser ones, and yet they’d boldly gone for our throats.

  Rising, I began walking to the castle with purpose. “Cailean, take men into the dungeons and check for our enemies. The babes are locked within the tower and are protected behind wards. Only the servants are within the stronghold. I want them all out of my home until we are certain they are not enemies. We allow no one inside until we are confident they are with us, not against us.

  “Darynda, start a triage center for the wounded coming in, and get Eliran’s nurses and medical staff up here immediately. Tell Eliran to expect iron poisoning and weapon wounds caused by blades with poisonous metal. I want everyone who can fight to pick up a sword and prepare to defend the horde stronghold against an assault. Move, because this fortress will not fall while the king is away. I will not allow it!”

  I turned slowly, staring at Adam, who regarded me with pain etching his features. Liam got to his feet, stepping closer, shaking his head. “I should be in the Blood Kingdom.” Agony burned in his azure-blue eyes as his scarred cheek ticked with anger. “I have to go back there now.”

  “Go back to what, Liam? Go back to a tomb?” I asked gently, moving away from him to stare down at Arryn, who screamed in pain. Others continued sifting into the courtyard, wounded or carrying the injured. My hand stroked his head, pushing away his thick blond hair, painted crimson with blood. My brow furrowed with worry for him, but more with what was coming. If they’d fallen, that meant they were either braver or stupider than we’d given them credit for.

  “Synthia…” Liam’s words died off as he shook his head as his hands rested on his hips.

  “There’s no reason to go back, Liam. You’re the Blood King now, and you,” I said, turning to Adam. “You’re the Dark King, and you are both needed to raise your armies to wage war and avenge your fallen. You are Danu’s chosen heirs and the rightful kings of your kingdoms. Dying a heroic death to retrieve corpses won’t bring the dead back.” Tears slipped down my cheeks while I studied them both. “Once the horde stronghold is cleared, we will move the injured inside. I’m so sorry for your losses.”

  “I’m sorry for your loss, too, Synthia,” Adam whispered, hugging me tightly. “I’m sick of losing people. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. We just found our families, and now they’re gone forever.”

  “Where is the King of the Horde?” Liam asked.

  “He just rode out to fight the mages.”

  “He’s gone? He is needed here. They’re bringing the war t
o us. Ryder shouldn’t have left you here unguarded.” Anger burned in Liam’s eyes.

  “Ryder is right where he is supposed to be. He took over forty thousand men to battle with him against our enemies. He left over twenty thousand troops here to defend this castle. I want to know how the mages took down our people. How the hell did they kill high fae so easily?”

  “It wasn’t just mages, Synthia. They had a god with them when they attacked us. One who bestowed death to everything he touched. He fought with more power than we could hope to defend. How the fuck do you fight against that?” Liam asked.

  “You call in the Goddess of War and pray she’s sane enough to help us win against our enemies.” I turned to stare up at the dragons regarding the tragedy unfolding below the battlements with sorrow. If I wasn’t certain Eris was in chains somewhere in Lucian’s kinky as shit basement, I’d think she was here, creating havoc. “Destiny, I need you. The Mórrígan, or Erie, if you can hear me, I need you too.”

  I stared up at the stars, watching as the night swallowed them into velvety darkness while I fought to contain the need to scream and cry, to rage against the reality of what had just happened.

  Bodies were being piled up against the outer walls, while our parents’ corpses were brought in and placed on rough stones. The warriors I’d sent had covered their bodies with the colors of their kingdoms, placing their crowns on their chests, identifying each caste they represented. By the time they finished, the entire courtyard was covered in shrouded corpses.

  I silently stood in front of my parents’ bodies, tears trailing down my cheeks as the wind howled around us. My hand lifted, touching Lasair’s lifeless body as Liam stood opposite of me, placing his hand over mine in reassurance and comfort. I wasn’t sure which I needed more. Madisyn’s tiny form lay beside him in death, and a soft sob escaped my lips past the hold I thought I had on my emotions.